I finally couldn't take it. Never knew that it would be so hard to stop yourself from crying. I guess to be superwoman attempt failed. But I can't take it anymore :( If I could just cry anytime I want, I think life would be much easier. Too bad, I can only blame myself just because I think it's gay to cry infront of people, so I got to put up a brave front and smile even if I don't want to. I guess it becomes a habit to just cry alone at home. Cry just to make yourself better even when you know nothing is going to change. Precisely, because nothing is going to change that's why I don't want to cry. But it's just so hard to control when life is so sucky now.
Sometimes I wish God can give me better friends. Then again no one is perfect. I guess the problem lies with me.